The politics of the absurd; Old Holborn and the Bear

Typed to Arcturus

There’s an out-of-the ordinary candidate – Old Holborn – standing in Cambridge in the general election, whose face has never been seen. He always wears a mask and no-one knows who he is. It’s legal. Here’s his? Blog http://www.oldholborn.net/ with the rubric:

You can stick your CCTV, Police State, wheelie bin Stasi, DNA, WMD, “Social Cohesion”, benefits for all, guilty until proved innocent, don’t do that it’s illegal now, can’t say that, ID cards for all, where are you going, what have you been saying/doing/reading, can’t photograph that, how very dare you, golliwog banning, we know where you live, we’re watching you Soviet Utopia up your arses. Sideways.

and videos of him http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJFhxNUzfF0

Before you dismiss him out-of-hand he and I agree about copyright. He puts it more picturesquely than me:

Copyright © Old Holborn 2007-2008 and the respective owners whoever they may be – though it’s hardly likely is it?. All rights reserved. Every single one. None of the materials provided on this web site may be used, eaten, reproduced, or transmitted, in whole or in part, in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, carrier pidgeon, osmosis, semaphore, chav txting (gr8) recording or the use of any information storage and retrieval system, papyrus, bits of old toilet paper, fag packets, carrier bags, mystic meg etc., except as provided for under fair use, without permission in writing from the publisher – me and my dog. To request such permission and for further enquiries, contact the dog using the contact form. Offer her a bone. She likes bones.

And a manifesto

To be governed is to be watched, inspected, spied upon, directed, law-driven, numbered, regulated, enrolled, indoctrinated, preached at, controlled, checked, estimated, valued, censured, commanded, by creatures who have neither the right nor the wisdom nor the virtue to do so. To be governed is to be at every operation, at every transaction noted, registered, counted, taxed, stamped, measured, numbered, assessed, licensed, authorized, admonished, prevented, forbidden, reformed, corrected, punished. It is, under pretext of public utility, and in the name of the general interest, to be placed under contribution, drilled, fleeced, exploited, monopolized, extorted from, squeezed, hoaxed, robbed; then, at the slightest resistance, the first word of complaint, to be repressed, fined, vilified, harassed, hunted down, abused, clubbed, disarmed, bound, choked, imprisoned, judged, condemned, shot, deported, sacrificed, sold, betrayed; and to crown all, mocked, ridiculed, derided, outraged, dishonoured. That is government; that is it’s justice; that is its morality.

Like the theatre of the absurd, this is the politics of the absurd. It should not be dismissed without thought. We are, indeed, faced with effectively almost no choice in this election – candidates whose similarities are greater than their differences and where the morality and effectiveness of MPs has been progressively eroded over the decades. I am not naive enough to believe that it was always better in the past, but there are almost no politicians of the stature of Foot, Healey, Heath, Thatcher, Jenkins. We are offered the choice of a bland uniformity of politicians with no intention of making parliament accountable to the people. As Gilbert put it:

“When in that house MPs divide
If they’ve a brain and cerebellum too
They have to leave that brain outside
And vote just as their leaders tell’em to

But then the prospect of a lot
Of dull MPs in close proximity,
All thinking for themselves, is what
No man can face with equanimity.

W.S.Gilbert, Iolanthe, 1882

Our system is broken – there is no leadership, no moderation by MPs, no policy and no accountability. Our state is out of control. The politics of the absurd is a natural reaction and has a long history in Britain.

So shall I vote for Old Holborn? I have not finally decided. But it’s a non-zero probability. The absurd vote has a legitimacy. After the election it’s a coalition of the Judean People’s Front with the People’s Front of Judea and probably an ungovernable mess. We are sick of the lack of traditional MPs to govern – why perpetuate this?

It’s an Open secret now that ever since I lived in Cambridge I have not voted, but the bear has:

I can only vote once, but the bear can early and often.

Old Holborn did not have to show his face, and nor do I. But I may have to satisfy them that I am who I say I am. It’s a way of taking elections seriously and absurdly at the same time. So if you are in Chesterton (CB4) you may see the bear early.

Because democracy has to be fought for on every day that we don’t have an election. The election is a holiday.